The Battle For Gay Rights is a Wrestling Match Over Masculine Identity

Liam Day explains the political controversy behind Vikings punter Chris Kluwe’s viral rant, and urges gay athletes to break the stereotype that pits homosexuality against masculinity.

In case you’ve been elsewhere the past few days, I’ll outline the bones of the controversy. There is a referendum on the ballot in the state of Maryland to uphold the recently passed Civil Marriage Protection Act, which will allow same-sex couples in that state to acquire a civil marriage license, but not impel clergy in churches that don’t recognize same-sex marriage to perform any ceremonies that violate their religion’s doctrine. Baltimore Raven’s linebacker Brendon Ayanbadejo contributed a pair of tickets to a fundraiser being held by Marylanders for Marriage Equality, which is leading the campaign to uphold the Civil Marriage Protection Act on the November ballot. Apparently, this did not sit well with Emmett C. Burns, Jr., a delegate to the Maryland General Assembly and a self-proclaimed “Baltimore Ravens Football fan.” In a letter to Ravens owner Steve Bisciotti, he claims, “Many of my constituents and your football supporters are appalled and aghast that a member of the Ravens Football Team would step into this controversial divide and try to sway public opinion one way or the other.” Delegate Burns concludes his letter by asking Mr. Bisciotti to, and I kid you not, “inhibit such expressions from your employee.” To his and his franchise’s credit, Mr. Bisciotti politely declined to heed this injunction.

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Jumping into the fray next, though, is Minnesota Vikings punter Chris Kluwe, who posted a letter to Deadspin defending Ayanbadejo’s right to speak out in support of gay marriage and attacking Delegate Burns for his attempt to suppress free speech.

In addition to offering more than a couple of Matt Taibbi-like turns of phrase, the most popular of which, “They won’t magically turn you into a lustful cockmonster,” is quickly making the rounds on the internet, Kluwe makes three basic points: 1) the attempt to cow Ravens ownership into silencing one of its employees is un-American; 2) one of the delegate’s justifications for this request, that political activism has no role to play in sports, which, in his words, are strictly about “pride, entertainment, and excitement,” ignores the rich history that sports have played in the politics, particularly the racial politics, of this country; and 3) same-sex marriage will have exactly “zero effect on your life.”

The first point may be self-evident, but it is worth pointing out that Delegate Burns’ request comes in the wake of an earlier controversy in which the mayors of Boston and Chicago both attempted to do just about what he is, by publicly stating they would bar Chick-fil-A from opening franchises in their cities due to the owner’s outspoken opposition to gay marriage, and they both suffered backlash from it, not to mention helping to boost Chick-fil-A’s sales. Clearly, the good delegate from Maryland either wasn’t paying attention or has the memory of a flea.

Moreover, both this controversy and the earlier one come in the wake of the Supreme Court’s Citizens United ruling, which treats corporations as individuals when it comes to political contributions. I don’t know about you, but I’m somewhat uncomfortable with the idea that a company’s right to free-speech, with which the court equates political donations, might be protected, even as politicians attempt to stifle the speech of those same business’s employees. For the one thing we should not lose sight of is that the Baltimore Ravens are not just a football team. They are also a multi-million dollar business.

Kluwe’s third point is also well-made. Personally, I don’t understand the fervid religious opposition to gay marriage the way I understand opposition to, say, abortion. If one believes that life begins at conception, then I get why one would be opposed to any attempts to end a pregnancy. I believe the issue to be more complex than that, but, at the least, I get the passion it generates on the other side.

I simply don’t understand opposition to gay marriage in a free society. There are any number of activities that people engage in on a daily basis that violate the doctrines and/or practices of a particular church. I drink so much coffee it would probably be easier if I just mainlined it, despite the fact it violates Mormon practice. Millions of Americans eat between sun up and sun down during Ramadan and just as many eat meat on Fridays during Lent. Yet I don’t see the polite young prostletizers in the crisp white shirts and black neckties attempting to pry the Dunkin’ Donut’s cup out of my shaking hand.

This brings me to Kluwe’s second point, which I believe is the most important. Sports have historically played a role in the racial politics of this country, often far ahead of the curve of other areas of American society and culture. Jackie Robinson made his debut with the Brooklyn Dodgers 7 years before the Supreme Court ruled in Brown v. Board, 10 years before President Eisenhower sent troops into Little Rock, Arkansas, and 17 years before passage of the Civil Rights Act. I hope that sports can play a similar role in the struggle for gay rights. In fact, not only do I hope they will, I believe that, for the struggle to be successful, they will have to. I honestly believe that one of the most important things that could happen for the struggle for gay rights is if LeBron James were to announce he were gay. Or Brian Urlacher or Dwight Howard or Derek Jeter.

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With apologies to my lesbian sisters, much of the battle for gay rights in this country is a Freudian wrestling match over masculine identity. We need someone to step up and subvert the stereotype, someone who dunks on his opponent or plants them in the turf off the blindside, then goes home to snuggle with his husband. I spent one year, what one might call a cup of coffee, playing professional basketball in Ireland. When I began teaching, I used this factoid to my advantage with some of the boys in my classes. It was the leverage I needed to get them to understand that a boy could be both smart and athletic. The lesson was driven home to me one day after I started as Dean of Students at a new middle school. Two of the boys, who were excited because I’d promised to start a basketball team, came running up to me in the hallway before first period. They didn’t say anything at first because they didn’t know quite how to broach the subject. Finally, one of them blurted out, “Mr. Day, you write poetry!?” It was half exclamation, because the internet had told them it was true, and half question, because they still couldn’t understand how someone can both play basketball and write poetry. Simply by combining the multiple aspects of my self, I was, if only in a very small way, helping to deconstruct the stereotypes their pre-pubescent minds had started to form about what it means to be a man. I’m only sorry they weren’t then also able to Google the fact that I’m bi-sexual. But, you see, I wasn’t fully out then. I lacked that courage, which is precisely the courage we need from some athlete or athletes to help begin breaking down the stereotype that pits homosexuality against masculinity. If that happens maybe, just maybe, 7 years or 10 years or 17 years from now we’ll be witness to legislation that grants marriage rights, which bestow full and equal recognition on gays and lesbians, not just in the blue states that cling to our country’s coasts, but all across this great nation.